Oh....I can't have some water?.........NO!

As an advisor and recruiter for The University of South Carolina on a military installation, my office is situated amongst other university offices and classrooms. Often the Base provides "leadership and responsibility training" for it's civilian employees. It's their way of making sure you know how to act on a military base and understand military protocol. Because my building is a very old one the water has turned a lovely shade of orange and I wouldn't drink it if my life depended on it. Due to the dirty water, I keep bottled water regularly stocked in my office (for myself).

Now that you have the background....

On one particularly ordinary day a class was being conducted in the room next to my office. That morning I brought in a new case of bottled water to replenish my supply. I placed it on my spare desk until I got logged in and had checked my messages (a bad choice on my part). I proceeded to work on some paperwork and get some things squared away. While on a phone call from a student the class happened to let out for a break. Occasionally in the past students would wonder in and ask questions. I have even had a few ask for water, at which time I referred them to the education office's water cooler and to the vending machines. However on this occasion, a brazen not so young woman walked into my office (talking on her cell phone). Walked right over to my plastic covered case of water bottles and proceeded to pull the plastic off and take a bottle out. I inquired "excuse me....can I help you?" "Oh....I can't have some water?" (proper english?)was her reply as she pulled my bottle out of the case. "Well, no.....that water is for my personal use it is not for the students in the classes, the university does not provide it for me." I explained. "It's just one damn bottle!". she exclaimed. "True" I replied, "but if I provide you with water, how can I discriminate from the next person who asks for free water, when there is a water cooler down the hall and a vending machine just outside the door." Now maybe I am selfish and a miserly Bitch, but I do believe in the common courtesy of asking before taking something that is not yours. At this point the (Insert unkind word here) lady inquired if she were interested in taking classes with USC, if I would then give her water as a marketing tool. I politely said "No....that's why I have the twizzlers on display not the water, help yourself to one of those." I then asked if she really was interested in college, and she stated "Fuck no! I go to Webster...so ha ha" as she waived her nasty finger in my face. Thankfully, she chose that moment to exit my office, because I was liable to throw the bottle at her. As she exited, she said to the person on the other end of the cell phone (yes! she was still on the phone!) "That stupid Bitch wouldn't give me my water!"

I must say, I was completely shocked at first, then rather amused. I decided to wander down the hall (after I put the water away) to share my new experience with my co-workers (who had equally horrifying experiences with this old hag and others). As the Education Director listened, it seemed my water debacle became the straw that broke the camels back and the it was brought to the training supervisor's attention. The ignorant woman was given a final warning, and encouraged to apologize (it has not happened, but when ever she is over here in my building, she sure is polite).

Moral to the story that turned out to a lot longer and annoying than I originally thought it would be.....Ask before you take!

I want an Enema!

I happen to be one of those fortunate people who live near a Drive-In Movie Theater. We used to go all the time before we moved from here, but now that we are back we are attempting to re-launch the tradition. This past weekend, the Marine and I decided to take the monkey to the Drive-in to see Monsters Vs. Aliens and Hotel for Dogs (a double feature!). we always try to make the drive-in as fun and comfortable as possible when we go. We take a bunch of pillows, put an egg crate in the back of the SUV, lay down all the seats and pop the back door. It is great! well....while we are waiting in the drive-in drive-thru to pay at the window and enter the drive-in, the building has a bunch of different candy and sayings painted on it. Monkey looks over and sees those dancing M&M's painted on the walls, and screams at the top of her lungs....."Mommy! I want an Enema! I want one of those! Can I have an enema pleeeeeeeze!" At this point the Marine and I are laughing so hard we can't answer her, much less explain the difference between and enema and an M&M. So I handed over the M&M bag I had purchased earlier that week for this occasion (They are so much cheaper at the store than at the movies!!!). I decided not to correct her, brcause....well.....I will never quite look at M&M candies the same again and to be quite honest, I want to see if she will say it again. maybe next time I'll luck out and she'll say it in public while she is w/ the Marine (he embarrasses far more easily than the Monkey and I do...it's kinda funny). So, for those of you chocoholic's out there.....Have you had your Enema today?

Quote of the week:

"Nobody knows the age of the human race, but everybody agrees that it's old enough to know better."

- Unknown

Every day I live and learn. I think that as a whole there are some lessons that are hard to compartmentalize, therefore we continue to make the same mistakes repeatedly. So maybe we really don't know better......Yet history shows that given enough time it can, does, and will repeat it's self often to the detriment of the human race. I am forgiving of mistakes, I just wish that our race as a whole were more kinder, more willing to learn, and more open to change. I know I wish this of myself. Then maybe then I really would know better.